"She liked me and I liked her."

 

Dear John,

   While trying to figure out the bills in your very organized cabinet, I spotted a folder that said "memories". It took me the longest time to take that out. What I was afraid of, I have no idea. What I found among cards and letters were a few pages you wrote while in Honduras in 2005.

  You were working from a memoir book and answering questions on paper. You wrote about early happy memories that included your Dad whistling for you from up the street, your brother Bob seeming to enjoy your company, sister Bernie walking with you while you dove in piles of leaves. You also mentioned your teacher, Sister Noemi, who gave you words to hang onto when you left grammar school in a fright: "It will be alright." And the day we met at 14."You wrote: "She liked me and I liked her". Yes, we did.

 In a separate sheet you spoke of being impressed with Rupert Sheldrake who was mentioned in a book about the labyrinth called "Walking A Scared Path". More than once you told me of his quote: "People should be pilgrims not tourists". I think that resonated with you because you indeed were on a pilgrimage each time you went to Central America to help God's children there.

 Well, still trying to hold onto you I went to Amazon and looked for his books. He has many and I chose "Science and Spiritual Practices". It is about the physical and mental benefits from certain activities that man has engaged in for millennia. For some reason when the book came, dark and with Queen Anne's Lace on the cover, I held it to my heart and thought: "This is your idea".

 And so it was. This book came to my hand to help me through the thicket of loss. It already has. There will be nothing new but just a nudge in the right direction.

The first two chapters were about meditation and gratitude. They were part of my life before and they will be again.  

And then I found among the cards this prayer typed on a piece of paper that must have meant much to you to be in that folder This, if said once with intent, could change a life. 

"My Lord,

I offer you my all-

whatever I possess, and more,

myself.

Detach me from the craving for 

prestige, position, wealth.

Root out of me

all trace of envy of my neighbor

who has more than I.

Release me from the vice of pride, my longing to exalt myself, and lead me to the lowest place.

May I be poor in spirit, Lord,

so that I may be rich in you."

John, you were rich in Him and I love you.